>Don’t assume, it makes an ass of u and me

>Steward at the races: “Excuse me, this area for is for disabled only can you move…. excuse me, disabled only up here… I’m sorry, you can’t come up here… are all of you together?”

Emma: “Yup”

[random brief conversation between me, Ben, Geri and Dad. Five minutes passed]

Steward: (to Ben) “Sorry could two of you stand back a bit. We prefer that wheelchair users only have one or two companions up front here because otherwise it means the spectators on the ground can’t see as this is raised.”

Ben: “No problem, we’ll get off of here completely.”

Steward: “Great, your Dad can stay here with your Mum.”

Emma (turns round to face the guy head on): “Ex-cuse me?! Dad can stay here with who?”

Steward: “uh, sorry. you can stay here with your sister, uh daughter… uh…”

Emma: “that’s better”
Steward (to the others): “Is she always like this?”

Others: “yes”

Emma: “Do I look like his mother?!”

Steward: “I’m sorry, I only saw the back of your head…”

Emma: laughs lots

Steward: beats a very hasty retreat!


When we went to the races in June, my mum had a falling out with one of the stewards… Experience would seem to suggest that the female members of this family cannot go to Newbury Racecourse without falling out with the stewards!

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