Accidentally Quiet

Yes, yes, anyone who knows me is probably reading this and going “quiet? You don’t do quiet Emma!” and they would be right.

When we went to the Paralympics our day pass tickets meant we could have gone in to goal ball. There weren’t any seats available though and I said to my friend that was probably a good thing because I thought I’d suck at watching goal ball. Because the audience is required to be quiet. And I’d really gotten into all the dancing, cheering, yelling, clapping, singing and screaming that had been involved in a watching a lot of the other sports involved, particularly sitting volleyball and wheelchair basketball.

So yes, there’s a reason why this blog is titled accidentally quiet. I’m referring to the fact that despite having many books reviews and other blogs to post I’ve been mostly silent online this week. My router broke and I’ve had no Internet at home. I can’t check my email on my phone for some reason either. I should be able to but it’s never worked and I can’t work out why.

Not having the net is strange. It’s frustrating in small ways like I keep meaning to look up a phone number on a website but forgetting when I get online (goes to do it now…) and I sent an important ish email last week that I’ve not had a response too. And it’s so ingrained my routine and perhaps even my psyche to be online all the time.

But I’ve spent a lot of time buried in a very long and very good book (11.22.63 by Stephen King) and I’ve done some writing, and got stupidly addicted to Fruit Ninja again. And twice I’ve been using the wifi in a coffee shop and ended up bumping into other CAB volunteers and having a long chat. Which is fun, particularly getting to know one of them a bit better. Part of me thinks I should have made better use of my enforced offline period and spent less time checking the sites I could get onto on my phone. But I know that’s ridiculous.

In a way I quite like it but mostly it does my head in. Particularly yesterday when I was tired, it was rainy, things went wrong and the details I needed to sort it were on my email. That ended up being a straw that broke the camels back especially when my Dad made a comment that usually would be ok and I burst into tears. When that happens its usually a sign that things aren’t great depression wise but this time I’m blaming the Internet.

I’d like to say that I hope to spend less time online from now on but I suspect I won’t when it comes down to it and I probably shouldn’t set unrealistic goals. I’ve been surprised by which sites I’ve missed and which I haven’t even thought about until I just now looked at my history. Perhaps I can use that to free up a little more time for more constructive tasks. Or at least to free up a little energy that’s being invested in being annoyed about Internet stuff that really doesn’t matter. I really haven’t missed that.

What I will say is I hope to be online properly soon and I feel like I have a lot to say then. In order to make that happen I’m off to PC World…

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