• 2015,  A to Z blogging challenge,  hopes and dreams,  Uncategorized,  writing

    A is for…

    A is for Author I have always wanted to be a writer and written stories. And I’ve blogged for nearly 15 years, since before it was called blogging in fact. I remember as a child around the age of 11 going to the shop with my Dad while on holiday in Puerto Pollensa, Majorca to be a notebook so I could write a story I had an idea for. That was a Star Trek: The Next Generation fanfic but it was years before I’d even heard of the term.  My next big story was around age 16 and that was a fanfic for ST:TNG too but I still hadn’t heard…

  • 2013,  acceptance,  access,  awareness,  blogging,  campaigns,  courage,  CP related,  current affairs,  difficulties,  disability,  disability normal,  disability rights,  freedom,  frustrations,  hopes and dreams,  I want to change the world,  identity,  Uncategorized

    In which I ramble and am grouchy when it comes to “awareness”

    (I was going to title this “why I’m not blogging about CP awareness day” and then I realised that by writing this I pretty much was blogging about CP awareness day just not in the way most people are and that would be a pointless title) So. Word on the street the internet is that 25th March is CP awareness day. i.e. that tomorrow is CP awareness day. Except,  to me, it’s not, really.  It’s national CP awareness day in the US.  I’m not in the US and I sometimes feel like the entirety of the fucking internet resolves around people from the US  and that those of us not…

  • depression,  hopes and dreams,  Sertraline,  Uncategorized,  writing

    >Writing is my passion

    >I’m writing again.  Regularly and in decent amounts when I do write.  It’s only been this week but I’ve written everyday so I’m sure that counts as regular.  And today I’ve done absolutely loads. I’ve been wanting to write I really have.  But with the way my depression crashed in and hit me I was fine if I had to leave the house and go somewhere for a set time, that I could do.  If it was something I had to do in my house like stick some clothes in to wash and something I needed to do but not at a set time that was a huge struggle.  And…

  • disability,  hopes and dreams,  Uncategorized,  writing

    >Answers!

    >Molly asked what inspired me to start blogging? It’s so long ago I’m not sure to be honest! As far as I can remember in February 2000 someone I knew online told me about Diaryland and I thought it was cool and signed up. Updated a few times, got bored and didn’t go back. Then 8th November that year I was at uni and I had unlimited internet in my room and nothing to do. Remembered diaryland, signed into my account again, deleted the original entries (which I sort of regret now) and that was it. 7 main blogs (this is my 7th) and many other one off entries and…

  • CP related,  hopes and dreams,  quotes,  sailing,  Uncategorized

    >CP had me

    >I always say that I do so much and everything because I don’t know how to do or be any different.  I was brought up no different to my brother and sister and was brought up not to let the fact I have CP and use a wheelchair stop me. It’s an attitude I’m grateful for and I couldn’t imagine being any other way.  I have CP.  I’ve always had it.  And I always will have it.  If I want to live my life and do things and achieve goals and make the most of whatever time I have then CP just is – it has to be.  I was…

  • friends,  fun stuff,  hopes and dreams,  songs of my life,  Uncategorized

    >Anything Can Happen

    >I travelled up to Birmingham yesterday and met up with my friend Rachel who I met at university and lived with for a year. It was really fun. Long, long day though. I ended up being out of the house for practically 12 hours (literally five minutes more and it would have been 12 hours). But so worth it. I had a wander round the shops while I was waiting for her, we went to Pizza Hut, had another wander round the shops together and then went to the theatre to see the Mary Poppins musical. Went to Starbucks for a drink after (couldn’t track down an accessible pub on…

  • Family,  friends,  hopes and dreams,  Uncategorized

    >”February is fabulous”

    >A long time ago, on a Tuesday in February, I was diagnosed with depression.  And one week later on another Tuesday I received a phone call. I was excited when I saw who was calling on the screen of my mobile.  But I should have known it wasn’t a good thing – because we were great friends but she never called me – it was always text and e-mail with the very odd letter.   Never in a million years did I expect what came next.  She had died the day before. This year marks five years since the day I received that diagnosis. the day a week later when I…

  • hopes and dreams,  memes,  memories,  Uncategorized

    >A Review of 2007 In Survey Form

    > A Review of 2007 In Survey Form   1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before? Got a tattoo. Learned to knit. Helped to run training for new people at work. Saw Daniel Radcliffe naked.   2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I had goals I was working towards – some I met and others I’m still working on.  Still others were unsuccessful.  I will set new goals for next year as I do frequently – reevaluating my life and situation.     3. Did anyone close to you give birth? No   4. Did…

  • hopes and dreams,  songs of my life,  Uncategorized

    >Hallelujah – Jeff Buckley

    > Well I’ve heard there was a secret chordThat David played, and he pleased the LordBut you don’t really care for music, do you?Well, it goes like this, the fourth, the fifthThe minor fall and the major liftThe baffled king composing hallelujahHallelujah, hallelujahHallelujah, hallelujah Well your faith was strong, but you needed proofYou saw her bathing on the roofHer beauty in the moonlight overthrew youAnd she tied you to her kitchen chairAnd she broke your throne, and she cut your hairAnd from your lips you drew the hallelujahHallelujah, hallelujahHallelujah, hallelujah Well baby I’ve been here beforeI’ve seen this room and I’ve walked this floor, you know,I used to live alone…

  • down,  hopes and dreams,  songs of my life,  Uncategorized

    >My Give a Damn’s Busted

    >As I posted earlier in the week, it wasn’t the best week for me. Particularly not Wednesday which was for reasons that I can’t talk about here. It shocked me how much that one stupid little incident got to me and really got me down. In fact, it even scared me a little. Particularly because it was something relatively normal for me and that I could have no way predicted would trigger my depression. Usually I am vaguely away that things will/may be hard and I can prepare for that but this just blindsided me. There is a tentative plan in place for me to come off of antidepressants at…