• hopes and dreams,  Uncategorized

    >2006 draws to a close and hopes for 2007

    > New Year is fast approaching. Less than seven hours left of this one and then it’s goodbye to 2006. What do I hope for in 2007? Better health without high blood pressure issues; less depression black spells and maybe a little less spasticity too. So basically we’re talking lose some weight for all of those. That my life will continue as it is now but that maybe I will find a new reserve on inner strength to make it easier. And that I might find the answers to the questions I ponder at the moment; the ones that make things hard for me and to which there does not…

  • hopes and dreams,  Uncategorized

    >A most feverant wish.

    >A phrase I’ve heard many many many times is “I know God won’t give me more than I can handle but I just wish He wouldn’t trust me so much!” Well that pretty much says it all today. But not for me. I wish my friends didn’t have so much to cope with because I’m on the outside of most of it and finding it hard to cope with… so how must they be doing?!?! I said to my carer earlier that things will be ok because they have to be. Well, I’m sick of them being ok because they have to be. I’d like things to be OK and…

  • Family,  hopes and dreams,  memories,  Uncategorized

    >Today

    >There are no gatherings the entire of my Dad’s side of the family, no laughter, no boxes of black magic being handed round. No homemade birthday cards on the mantelpiece and old banners and birthday pictures we had all made years ago hanging over the hatch between the sitting room and kitchen. No hugs, love you lots or Happy Birthdays. The floor isn’t covered in sparkly bright wrapping paper waiting to be ironed and reused and the side table next to her chair isn’t stacked with presents – evening primrose oil goodies, racing books and a fun shaped box of tissues. No teasing, good times or warm feelings. Today is…

  • hopes and dreams,  quotes,  Uncategorized

    >Hope

    >I was looking for a quote about hope to share tonight because I feel very full of hope about my future and how things seem to be panning out of me at this present moment in time. I really do have a huge sense of peace and wellbeing and I realise looking at just how well I have handled things I expected to be difficult just how much of a role hope has played in this. The knowledge that everything will be ok and the hope that this belief is true I mean. Well, this isn’t exactly a quote but I think it does express exactly what I want and…

  • Family,  hopes and dreams,  Poetry,  Uncategorized

    >Remember

    >I’ve just put the computer on so I can lie down and listen to some MP3’s but thought I would update here quickly first.The funeral was today and it was an extremely long day. But, I feel we did her very very proud and said the best “See you sometime” that we could have. Everything that was read/sung/prayed was so appropriate for her and I felt like while the Vicar did go off on a bit of a tangent at times (and Dad had thought he might) he talked a lot of sense, even if you don’t agree with the religious messages. Two things from the service I wanted to…

  • hopes and dreams,  I wish I wrote this,  Poetry,  Uncategorized

    >Hope

    >Wonderfully written with a powerful message… I wish I had written this… I wish I could write like this… Hope If you can look at the sunset and smile, then you still have hope. If you can find beauty in the colors of a small flower, then you still have hope. If you can find pleasure in the movement of a butterfly, then you still have hope. If the smile of a child can still warm your heart, then you still have hope. If you can see the good in other people, then you still have hope. If the rain breaking on a roof top can still lull you to…