>Twists and Turns

>Day 40 of 100. This feels like a huge achievement.

I feel a little better today but still pretty grotty. Good news is my chest has cleared up so I obviously don’t need antibiotics and didn’t go to the doctors. Frankly I’m amazed by that. I never thought it would improve this much. My parents and I were all convinced last night that I’d have to seen. In fact Mum told me she had a bad night worrying about me.

Anyway, here’s another poem

Twists and Turns

A twist in the road
And then a turn
Both usual things
But at the same time unexpected
Unwanted unnecessary and definitely unwarranted

The road twisted
Where usually it turns
And this turn
Would usually have been a twist.

Not a big deal
At first glance
If anything it’s good
It gives a great chance
To see things that are all too real
And those you didn’t think you would

But then in other ways it’s bad
Because plans have changed
An easy day would have been had
Until it had to be rearranged

And then the road twists
Yet again
Before it turns
Yet again

The journey continues
Nothing to worry about
Good or bad
This journeys all you have
No matter what
You have to see it out

Like it or loathe it
Twists and turns
Are all you’ve got
Turns and twists
Your life’s journey
Something not to be missed.

♥ Emma

>A Journey

>Being poorly sick sucks. This cold has gone to my chest. But it is providing good inspiration for my 100 days of writing.

A Journey

A tired crip sits in her wheelchair somewhat unwillingly. It’s really not a good day for her but life doesn’t stop and she’s forced to continue on her journey. So she wheels on and on in a slow plodding manner lacking her usual energy.

The land she’s journeying through is a tough one, bleak with more obstacles than The Country of Everyday Life and she searches desperately for the road that will lead her there once again. Somehow she’s spent the last several days in the Realm of The Cold with no end in sight. Happy days and fun times seem a distant memory. The landscape is one of tissues, lip balm and Olbas Oil, in no way what a crip wants to see on her journey.

Suddenly the journey gets harder. The crip needs to rest more often. But that rest gets interrupted constantly by the need to keep moving. Things aren’t looking good.

Until. A glimmer of hope.

A fork in the road.

Heartened the crip speeds up her wheeling believing her return to The Country of Everyday Life could be down that fork.

Full of hope she heads down it. Pleased to see The Realm of The Cold disappearing behind her.

Until. Hope disappears.

The crip finds herself in The Land of The Chest Infection.

♥ Emma

>Cold

>Snotty snivelling sneezing
Streaming eyes
Chapped lips
And tickley throat

Coughing
Sore chest
Too many tissues to count
And no energy

Sniffing thickly noisily breathing
Plans cancelled
Eyes closed
Olbus oil fills the room

The girl gives up
Sips water incessantly
Goes to bed
Feeling sad

Happiness joy and cheer
The virus runs away smiling
Pleased his work is done
Her first cold of the year

♥ Emma

>Goals for the week

>It’s been a bit of a crap week and I’ve been feeling down at times, missing my meds and feeling a bit ill on and off. I do think there’s been a bit of a virus going around as a couple of other local people have complained of nausea too.

Anyway although I’m slowly pulling it back together now and have an actual proper achievement to show for today – I went back to a very badly stalled project and have got it moving again. I thought it would be good to set a few goals.

1. Take my sertraline daily.
2. Take my baclofen at least once a day (will worry about consistently taking the second dose next week, getting some in is a better goal now)
3. Work on the above mentioned project daily.
4. 1 hour total in the standing frame.
5. Watch The Lord of The Rings
6. Send emails I’ve been procrastinating about

>Not really an update

>Naidex was fun.  If you’ve been following my twitter stream for the past few days you’ll hopefully know that.  But you’ll also know there was lots of access related fail which made for stressfulness and made things difficult.  And if you’ve seen my twitter stream today you’ll know that I woke up this morning to the realisation that I must have seriously misjudged my fluids yesterday and not drank/been to the loo often enough because I felt crap and possibly had a UTI.  I’ve been to the Dr who has confirmed my diagnosis and given me antibiotics.   Fully updating on who I met, what we did, what was fun, access fail etc will have to wait.

>Well I was…

>…planning to write a long blog entry about lots of different things and thoughts and feelings and such like.

But I’ve had a major headache for most of the day and it’s only just now properly resolving.   Literally as soon as I decided I was 110% not going sailing tonight it went from feeling better to feeling a lot better.  Which is frustrating but totally the right decision because I’m looking forward to a day out on Friday and I didn’t want to push myself and go sailing tonight then not be well enough to do stuff the rest of the week.  Particularly not the barge trip Friday.

So I’m glad I’m feeling better but the whole not pushing myself to do something just in case thing is hard for me to deal with.

I still don’t feel like writing a long blog entry though.  So let’s just pretend I did.

>Very Bad Cold

>I’m down another 1lb this week for a total of 6lb since Valentines day.  I’m surprised by that today given that I have a very bad cold (downgraded this morning from yesterday’s status of very very bad cold).  I’ve not felt like eating but I’m also the queen of congestion and mucus at the moment.

I’m hoping I can lose another 3lb in the next two weeks as I get my eyebrows waxed that week and we always have this thing where one or the other of us will go “I’m gonna lose half a stone before I see you next” and she’s managed it but I never have.

>Slightly Sick But Lucky

>I’ve been feeling off all weekend and last night was absolutely convinced I had a UTI (I used to be the queen of them).  My bladder and that area was that painful.  But thankfully a trip to the nurse this morning reveals that whilst I am symptomatic nothing is showing up.  And my temp is fine so there shouldn’t be something else making me feel like this.  So I’ve antibiotics to start taking if I still have pain this evening or tomorrow morning.  The nurse (nurse led minor illnesses clinic) checked with the doctor and basically with my history and those symptoms…

I still feel off but I feel a lot better knowing that I pretty much don’t have an infection – after six in seven months in 2003/2004 which were only cured by four months of 50mg daily nitrofurantoin –  getting those symptoms to that extent makes me anxious.  Lots and lots of fluids and some cranberry extract for me today it seems.

It’s a wheelchair thing and it’s not good.  But I heard some stuff yesterday that reminded me that even as a CP-er I am very lucky and if being prone to UTI is to be my non wheelchair major CP issue then so be it.  A lot of people have it worse than me.

Still, the weekend was fun other than that (but that’s a whole ‘nother entry…)

>Magic Ointment

>I have otitis externa 🙁 otherwise known as an outer ear infection. Or swimmers ear. However I didn’t need Abx, just some magic ointment. Well, technically they just referred to it as [name] ointment but I like to call it magic because it has an antibiotic, an anti fungal and a corticosteroid in it and it works super fast. Also calling it magic ointment is a lot easier to say that tri-adcortyl otic.

I stuck to my diet yesterday despite feeling lousy. Today not so much.

I’m not swimming today. And I must remember to buy some goddamn earplugs before i do swim next. Any ideas where to get them?

Today was the first time I have rung or been anywhere near the doctors since seeing the nurse last AUGUST!

>I appear to be developing a cold.  Seems that my carer does know how to share after all…  Thanks and all that, it was nice of you to think of me.  But next time, keep it to yourself.  Please.