• 2016,  acceptance,  argh,  attitudes,  awareness,  CP related,  frustrations,  things people say,  Uncategorized,  wheelchair

    “She’ll run you over”

    There are a lot of allegedly jokey comments that people make about or to me as a wheelchair user.  Usually well meaning and perhaps an attempt at being funny. They aren’t funny.  Most of them never were but one or two may have been if not for the fact that I hear them all the time.  I’m talking about the “women drivers” comments. The people who say “do you have a license for that thing?” Those who randomly see me and go “no speeding!” And many others. I often roll my eyes at that sort of thing and let it go because it’s usually strangers and theres no point getting…

  • 2016,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    It’s not what you say

    As a wheelchair user there are certain comments, questions, and even jokes about my disability and/or being a wheelchair user that I hear often.  And that’s sort of OK.  I’m used to it and over being bothered by them in most cases. People (strangers) will ask why I’m in a wheelchair, have I been disabled long, that sort of thing.  Sometimes I answer, sometimes I ask why they want to know.  That usually depends on whether they take me by surprise or not and how feisty and argumentative I’m feeling. And answers to my replying “Why do you want to know?” tend to be interesting too. But this week I’ve…

  • 2015,  blogging,  carnivals,  CP related,  depression,  disability,  disability blog carnival,  disability blogs,  disability voices,  I want to change the world,  internet,  personal,  perspective,  questions,  things people say,  thinking,  twitter,  Uncategorized

    Rotation Curation for #Disability #rocur

    I’ve been curating the @OxfordIsYours twitter account.  It’s a RoCur (Rotation Curation) account for Oxford and the person who runs it said living in Oxfordshire counts. Basically RoCur is where there’s an account (often on twitter) where people take a week at a time to run it and share their experiences and tweet on the subject.  Most of these relate to places – like with Oxford Is Yours I’ve been tweeting about where I’ve been and what I’ve done – but some relate to hobbies or jobs or organisations or anything else. I’ve been enjoying it and have learned about a place in Oxford I’m going to visit soon I…

  • 2014,  disability,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    Polite Small Talk

    I meet usually at least two new people each week through CAB.  If I see them as clients I can often find out a lot about them.  They rarely learn much about me.  I do tell them my  name but often that and the fact I’m sat there in a powerchair is all they learn about me. I also do resident involvement stuff with the housing association I rent from.  I’ve made one really good friend through that and I’m friendly with several others.  But I’ve met loads of people there.  And also because I’ve done disability awareness talks there for staff and tenants there have been a few occasions…

  • 2014,  antidepressants,  depression,  fluoxetine,  honesty,  meds,  mental health,  personal,  Sertraline,  things people say,  treatment,  Uncategorized

    Apparently people with mental health problems just need to “tell someone”

    So Robin Williams has died.  Suicide.  And that’s sad as any death is. Facebook is full of posts with his picture sharing phone numbers and websites of helplines.  Ones telling people that “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.”  And declarations that if you’re feeling down, if you have depression to make sure you tell someone.  Friend’s saying that they hope their friends feel capable of telling them.  And similar on twitter and other places. Here’s the thing: I have a depression diagnosis and I have a lot of anxiety at times which has been recognised by medics although it’s never been given a label like GAD (generalised…

  • 2014,  disablism,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    Can you actually hear yourself?

    Sometimes I think I should start carrying a dictaphone or similar around with me everywhere and recording my conversations.  Because just lately so many people have said things to me – people who I know – and have come across so ableist that I’ve been shocked.  And in a couple of the cases I’ve known what they’ve actually meant and suspected that if I made them listen back to what they said they may well realise how inappropriate their wording was. In two of the three most recent cases I feel confident that the other person in the conversation didn’t mean to hurt me and was just wording things wrong…

  • 2013,  achievements,  C-A-B,  personal,  success stories,  Things I am proud of,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    Thank You

    I’m quite well known for not noticing people waving to me when I’m out and about. Or not knowing who people are when they know me. Part of that has to do with the fact I meet so many people through things like CAB. I’m usually the only person they deal with but depending on if I’m doing appointments of gateway (10 minute triage like interviews) I might see up to 4 people in one session. The big thing in training for CAB is confidentiality. One of the points made about it is that due to that you shouldn’t acknowledge clients outside the bureau. That’s easier than it sounds because…

  • 2013,  acceptance,  access,  argh,  attitudes,  CP related,  difficulties,  disability,  drama,  frustrations,  powerchair,  Quickie Salsa,  ranting,  sarcasm,  so you had a bad day,  things people say,  Uncategorized,  wheelchair

    A word of advice

    For those who don’t know me. Don’t try offering me unsolicited advice or helpful suggestions about my wheelchair and then go off on me when I tell you’re wrong and calmly explain the reasons why I do what I do and/or can’t do anything else. Telling me where you saw me cross the road is dangerous is one thing. Repeatedly screeching at me that I’m going to get myself killed when I tell you its the only place I can is upsetting. And talking to me like I’m stupid and telling me that I do have a choice and could cross the road elsewhere is another that shouldn’t happen. Suggesting…

  • 2012,  disability,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    Success and a mind boggling moment

    I think the problem I’ve been struggling with is mostly resolved.  But strangely having been told that I’d made a difference for the disabled people who come after me it’s actually possible that this solution will just benefit me. I know they plan to implement this with any other disabled people who can’t use the standard way of doing things. But the cost involved means they’ve had to come up with a solution other than the one they hoped to. Which due to the set up means it could be difficult to implement for others. I’m waiting for one more answer and to see if things go as planned but…

  • disability,  serial casting,  things people say,  Uncategorized

    >Ask a stupid question…

    >Get a stupid answer! For various reasons I went out yesterday without the fugly clown shoe like cast shoes on top of my casts Fugly cast shoes. The ones I have now are too big for my feet (the ones I had that fit went missing when left at the hospital for the few days I was out of plaster earlier this week) hence the clown shoe description. I went to the supermarket. I was wearing my red skirt which perfectly matches my red casts. Because clearly, matching your clothes and casts is important (unless I want to wear my favourite skirt which clashes but I love, that is…) And…